Brooke: Hi! I’m Babbling Brooke, the producer of Sam and Ted’s Famous Last Words. Welcome to the Babbel Sound Studio, where we’re sitting in on an American and a Brit twisting each others words, getting tongue tied and generally reflecting upon the strange beauty of that majestic, rather odd thing we call the English Language…

You're listening to Sam and Ted's Famous Last Words.

Sam: Ted, tell me, is it true that people walk around wearing cheese hats where you come from?

Ted: In Wisconsin?

Sam: Yeah, in Wisconsin. I did a Google image search and I found all these pictures of people wearing cowboy hats made of cheese!

Ted: Yeah sure, it’s a thing. But we only wear them on special occasions, mostly at sporting events (Go Packers!) but they’re not really made of cheese! That would smell awful.

Sam: Oh right, well that makes sense… somehow. Well, I’m glad you’ve busted that myth for me!

Ted: Busted your what?

Sam: Myth! To bust a myth means, you know like, disprove something. So, you prove that something is false… it’s untrue. It’s a myth, a legend, a rumour… bust means destroy - you're busting a rumour!

Ted: Like the ghostbusters?

Sam: The ghostbusters busted ghosts, not rumours.

Ted: But they did have a cool car, they wore jumpsuits and they lived in an old fire station.

Sam: It's true, all of it. In fact, hang on, we could call ourselves the… The Mythbusters! Cos you know, we have cool bikes and we wear weird clothes… and whole the fire station bit is just not important. We’ll ride around the streets on our bikes busting myths and telling everyone the truth.

Ted: Hmm, I’m not sure it would make such an exciting film. And I think the name Mythbusters is already taken.

Sam: Oh. Really?

Ted: Yeah, yeah, there was this really famous TV show in the States for a while where these nerdy science guys would go around disproving common myths. Like, in one episode they proved that you can’t shoot an arrow in the same exact spot as another arrow, like in Robin Hood.

Sam: Hmpf. Right. Well then what about we call ourselves the Truthfinders? Or the Rumourquashers?

Ted: Rumourquashers?

Sam: We’re gonna quash your rumours, people - watch out!

Ted: Quash yourself, bud.

Sam: I’ll quash you if you don’t watch out.

Kieran: Quash off!

Sam: Who’s that?

Ted: It’s Kieran

Sam: Oh yeah, hi Kieran.

Kieran: Hi

Sam: Ted, why is Kieran here?

Ted: Well, he’s gonna quash a rumour for us!

Sam: Oh. Brilliant!

Ted: Yeah, because you know there are a lot of myths out there about learning languages.

Sam: Are there?

Ted: Yeah you know, supposedly easy “tricks” to help you learn a language without any effort.

Sam: Like getting drunk? You know that British people think that getting drunk makes you fluent in French.

Ted: Exactly! And that’s why we have Kieran here. He is gonna help us test that theory.

Sam: Oh!

Ted: I am calling this segment:
 
Booze or Snooze?

Booze or Snooze Language Learning, Booze or Snooze Language Learning, Booze or Snooze Language Learning on a Babbel Podcast!! Ohh Arrrrhh! 

Sam: Booze or snooze?

Ted: Yeah. We’re gonna take a look at this “drunk fluency” myth.

Sam: Sounds like a disease to me...

Ted: Disease or not, we’ll also examining some other common language learning “tricks” to see if they are actually effective!

Sam: And why is it called ‘Booze or Snooze’, Ted?

Ted: Well Sam, the myth is that the more booze, or alcohol, you drink, the better you get at speaking a foreign language. So we’re gonna see if this common myth is true or false. As for the “snooze” part, we’ll get to that in a second.

Sam: The whole thing sounds a bit dodgy to me.

Ted: Well, that’s what we’re here to find out. In fact, I have come up with a way to test it and Keiran here has agreed to be our laboratory test rat.

Keiran: Wheeyay! Love it.

Ted: It’s groundbreaking research, Sam. This could make us famous!

Sam: What? More famous than our Famous Last Words? Sounds great, tell me more.

Ted: Well. We know that Kieran here enjoys a pint of beer now and then, and he also learned some French back in school. So we’re going to ask him to say a bit about himself in French, and then we’ll send him in the corner with a keg of beer, and later in the episode we will bring him back and test to see if his French has got any better…
 
… or worse!

Sam: Wow, well that sounds very scientific!

Ted: I got straight As in science at school, Sam. I’m practically Einstein. Anyway…

Sam: Anyway what?

Ted: Welcome to the studio, Kieran Savvy. Can you tell us what you do here at Babbel, in your best French?

Kieran: Mais oui!

Ted: And don’t worry listeners, Sam will translate for us!

Sam: Will I? Ok, yeah, sure.

Ted: Alright, let’s hear it, Kieran.

Sam: Yeah come on Kieran, hit us with your best French.

Kieran: Oui! Je suis Kieran, J’habite à Berlin. Je travaille comme rédacteur… à Babbel!

Sam: Ok I think I understood what he said. His name is Kieran.

Ted: Yeah, I could have told you that.

Sam: He lives in Bearlan… which could be maybe a balloon… or a bell or a bear or something.

Ted: How unusual. I guess he means Berlin.

Sam: Oh right yeah, ok, of course. And he’s a copycat for Bubble.

Ted: That’s Babbel. 

Sam: Oh yeah, sorry! 

Ted: He works as a copywriter for Babbel.

Sam: Wow! Your French is magnifique, mon ami! Non?

Ted: Oui. C’est vrai. It’s true, my girlfriend is French. So anyway, are you ready for the next part of the Booze or Snooze challenge, Kieran?

Kieran: I guess so.

Ted: Good. Here’s a keg of beer. Go sit over there in the corner and start drinking. We’ll check in on you in ten minutes or so, ok?

Kieran: Awesome. See you later guys…

Sam: Now Ted, what are those other language learning myths you were talking about?

Ted: Well, this is the snooze part - that is, the idea that you can learn a language while you sleep, or snooze!

Sam: Oh yeah, right! I once tried putting a Dutch textbook under my pillow at night to see if Dutch words would seep into my brain while I slept.

Ted: Really? Did it work?

Sam: Sadly not. I just woke up with this silly windmill song in my head.

Ted: Well, that’s definitely… interesting, but not exactly what I mean. You see, there’s this myth that if you listen to a podcast, or an audiobook or some other kind of foreign language recording while you sleep that it will somehow enter your subconscious, and you’ll be able to speak the language when you wake up!

Sam: Sounds great! I mean, repeating vocabulary really helps.

Ted: Yeah but not while you’re asleep! I mean, just imagine you fell asleep with your favorite TV show on. Are you going to know what happened when you wake up? Probably not.

Sam: That’s a shame. It sounds quite efficient.

Ted: It’s the same with hypnosis. No one ever learned French by going to a hypnotist.

Sam: A hypnotist cured my uncle.

Ted: That may be, but did he teach him a foreign language?

Sam: I don't think so. He doesn’t bark like a dog any more… English speakers are rubbish at learning languages, anyway. Just like old people. That’s what I heard.

Ted: Ha! Those are both myths! I’m here to tell you that they’re just. not. true. It doesn’t matter what your native language or your age is. Everyone can learn languages. We are living proof!

Sam: Are we?

Ted: Yes, Sam. We’re English natives but we both speak several other languages.

Sam: The language of love, you mean?

Ted: That too! 

Sam: So our brains aren’t any different than other people’s brains?

Ted: Well yours sure is. But no, in general, we all have the same potential for learning languages. It’s just that if you grow up with lots of languages and bilingual people around you, the idea of learning another language doesn’t seem unusual or difficult. You’re naturally more confident. And of course language learning is easier when you’re younger, but that’s because kids have more time to study and they're also a lot less worried about “making mistakes” than adults, of course.

Sam: Hmmm, sure, yeah. I guess one reason that a lot of English speakers don’t learn foreign languages is because English is such a global language, right? I mean it’s pretty easy to be lazy while you're travelling.

Ted: Exactly. It’s not that they can’t learn, it’s just that they don’t.

Sam: My grandfather, for example, travelled a lot and he used to just speak more loudly… in English with a few made up words like ‘mangy mangy’.

Ted: Mangy mangy?

Sam: Yeah, he would shout “Mangy mangy!” at waiters when he was hungry. He must have heard an Italian saying mangiare at some point, but then he said it everywhere he went - Spain, Greece, all over!

Ted: And did it work?

Sam: Well he certainly wasn’t a thin man… I mean he never missed a meal, so I guess he must have made himself understood somehow.

Ted: Good God. You clearly get your language speaking skills from your grandfather. Well, anyway. My point is that there are some tricks that you can use to speed up your language learning.

Sam: Like taking caffeine pills and staying up all night cramming before a test, right?

Ted: NO SAM. Definitely not. Cramming does not help you in the long-term. Imagine that your brain is a bit like a suitcase.

Sam: I think my brain is a bit like a suitcase. Carry on!

Ted: It works really well if it doesn’t have too much stuff shoved into it at one time. If it’s too full, it will pop open and you’ll have your underwear spilling out onto the floor for everyone to see.

Sam: I hate it when that happens. So if cramming doesn’t work, what tricks are there?

Ted: Well, for example, setting a specific time every day to study for even just fifteen minutes; reviewing what you’ve learned at regular intervals; making your own flashcards…

Sam: Hmm… flashcards are good. What helps me is mnemonics.

Ted: What? Moronics?

Sam: No Ted, mnemonics.

Ted: How do you spell that and what is it.

Sam: You spell it: m n e m o n i c s. A mnemonic is something that helps you remember.

Ted: Ah, a memory aid!

Sam: Exactly!
 
My memory is terrible, so if I’m trying to learn new words I have to make word associations - that is connections between words. Sometimes they’re things that rhyme, or maybe there’s some connection in the meaning, and it helps me remember even more if it’s funny. Take al hisab, for example, which means “the bill” in Arabic.

Ted: We say the check in the US

Sam: Yeah, sure, whatever. Well I remember al hisab by thinking of the name Elizabeth, which if you say it like El iz a bet, sounds quite similar - Al hisab - Elizabeth. Anyway, Elizabeth is the name of the British queen, right? And I guess she never has to pay the bill!

Ted: Huh! Very clever, Sam. You know, another thing that’s really useful is setting a grammar rule to music. Like, when I was trying to learn some German prepositions, we had this song that went like this: “aus ausser bei mit nach seit von zu”.

Sam: Yeah, I don’t know about that, just makes me want to dance!

Ted: Well, actually, that might not be a bad idea either. Pairing studying with movement can also improve your ability to remember things! For example, if you go through a list of vocabulary or repeat some phrases in your head while running, biking, swimming, or even dancing, it will be easier for your brain to recall them later!

Sam: Crazy! But actually I did learn the Arabic alphabet by walking around the block and then learnt to say it in reverse while walking backwards, so I guess you could say kinetic learning definitely works. Hey say, Ted, did you have any mnemonics you liked to use with students maybe when you were an English teacher?

Ted: Yeah, sure. I had lots but I don't think we have time to talk about all of them. But one of my favourites was when I was teaching conditionals, you know these dreaded “If/then” sentences?

Sam: Urgh horrible. 

Ted: Sometimes I would hear students make some mistakes like “If I will see you tomorrow…” or “If I would win the lottery…”, so I came up with a couple rhymes to help them out, the first one was: “If and will makes the teacher ill” and “If and would is never good”.

Sam: Ooh that's clever. My teaching approach was to shout at students and make them cry… Basically Ted, you’re the juicy carrot of English teaching and I’m the birch rod!

Ted: The what?

Sam: The cane, the stick. You’re the good cop, I’m the bad cop.

Ted: Speaking of law and disorder, I wonder how our laboratory rat is doing…

Sam: Oh, yeah. Are you alright over there, Kieran? How much beer have you had to drink?

Kieran: Je ne sais pas… cinque litres, peut-être?

Ted: What did he say, Sam?

Sam: He’s not sure, but about five litres.

Ted: Wow, he drinks fast.

Sam: Yeah he’s British. Brits are very thirsty

Ted: Shall we test his French?

Sam: Good idea. Kieran, can you tell us something about your yourself in French? What are your hobbies?

Kieran: Mais oui! Je joue au foot. Et j’aime les Folies Bergère.

Ted: Like the Can-can dancers?

Kieran: Mais oui!

Ted: Ouh la la

Kieran: Oui, et j’aime la cuisine française.

Sam: Yeah we all like French food - especially French fries.

Kieran: Et je danser à bout de souffle.

Sam: You dance until you’re out of breath?

Kieran: Non non non, je danser! Je danser dans…. un… boîte de nuit! Oui! Un boîte de nuit! Dans le Berghain.

Sam: Oh right. I get ya. He goes dancing in nightclubs.

Kieran: Tout le temps. Tout tout… tout le… temps.

Sam: Vraiment? All the time?

Ted: Well I’ll be damned.

Sam: Could be, Ted, could be. So what do you think? Is the beer helping Keiran ‘talk foreign’ or just making things worse?

Ted: Hmm it’s hard to tell. I think his accent has improved, but maybe he’s just a bit more relaxed.

Sam: Yes, he certainly has relaxed a bit - maybe he’s too relaxed. He’s slurring his words. But sometimes French sounds a little slurred, right?

Ted: I suppose. Let’s check in on him again at the end of the show.

Sam: Good idea! Kieran, we’re gonna check in on you again at the end of the show, ok? Continuer à boire! Keep drinking!

Kieran: Sure! Très bien!! 

Sam: Very good. Now, Ted. What else have you got up your sleeves?

Ted: Sleeves? I don’t have anything up my sleeves. I’m not a magician! Plus I’m wearing a sleeveless shirt.

Sam: I sometimes wonder if you’re really an English native speaker, Ted. What I mean is: What other ideas do you have for today’s podcast? What are we going to talk about?

Ted: Ahh… Ermm… AWOL

Sam: What?

Ted: AWOL! You know, acronyms! It’s not about myths, I know, but acronyms are super confusing for everyone, whether you’re learning English or grew up speaking it. You know what an acronym is, right don’t you Sam? It’s a phrase that you shorten by just using the first letter of all or some of the words. Like AWOL, which means Absent Without Leave. You know, when someone disappears from work or from the army without permission, we say they’ve gone AWOL.

Sam: Ah. Yeah, right. And then there’s LOL, which had me quite confused for a while, if I'm honest. When people first started using it in text messages, I thought LOL meant ‘lots of love’ and was, like, why are people being so weird and over affectionate? I don't even know you. Don’t they have any boundaries? I found it especially weird that they’d write ‘lots of love’ in response to my jokes...

Ted: Ha! The joke was on you.

Sam: Yeah that’s right! Because it means ‘laugh out loud’!

Ted: Right. But these days people rarely “laugh out loud” when they use lol, right? I mean, I type that at work like 20 times a day. It can also be used sarcastically.

Sam: What?! You can use LOL sarcastically????

Ted: Hello!!!??? You really are a bit slow sometimes. Sure we use it sarcastically.

Sam: Ted, do you mean all those times you typed LOL to me, you weren’t really laughing out loud?

Ted: You’re so naive, Sam.

Sam: You’re so cynical, Ted.

Ted: LOL

Sam: Hahaha.

Kieran: What about VPL?

Ted: What was that, Keiran? VPN?

Kieran: No. VPL!

Ted: What is he talking about?

Sam: Oh, it's a popular one in the UK. VPL means visible panty line. You say it when you can see the outline of someone’s underwear through their clothes.

Ted: Is that why you wear a thong?

Sam: Well, that’s one reason. Anyway, let’s keep it clean, Ted… What’s a VPN?

Ted: A VPN is a Virtual Private Network.

Sam: OMG Ted, I said keep it clean! My grandmother listens to this podcast.

Ted: Sam, it’s not dirty. It’s an internet thing. V P N. Go look it up if you’re confused.

Sam: Oh yeah. And what about WTF.

Ted: What The *bleep*!!!???

Sam: Yeah we can’t say *bleep* on this show. Brooke will *bleep* out all the *bleep*and *bleep*s

Ted: That’s a shame.

Sam: Hey, do they write RSVP on invitations in Wisconsin?

Ted: RSVP? Yeah, sure! You know its French, right?

Kieran: French? Je speak French!

Sam: Who was that?

Ted: It was Kieran. I think he might be a bit tipsy…

Kieran: Hihi oui oui, je suis tipsy!

Sam: I think he’s more than a bit tipsy - he’s trashed! That’s what drinking before lunch does for you...

Ted: Well we’d better do the final test before he passes out. Alright. Kieran. Are you with me?

Kieran: Beh ouais.

Ted: Ok. It’s your last chance to show us if drinking has improved your ability to speak French.

Kieran: Je suis ready! Red EEEE!

Ted: Ok. So what does RSVP stand for?

Kieran: Ouuuuuu merde! C’est easy. Rendezvous sans visible panties. Non non non. Ce n’est pas vrai… vrai…vrai. One second, s’il vous plait. Respecter sssss valise, police officer?!

Ted: What did he say?

Sam: Well, first he said something about meeting without underwear on, then he told a policeman to respect suitcases. Kieran, une question. Combien de doigts je lève?

Ted: Yeah, how many fingers is he holding up?

Kieran: Quoi? What? Where? Où est les fingers? Merde, c’est difficile! Je pense… quatre-vingt dix. Boff!

Ted: He just said you were holding up 90 fingers. I think that we’ve proved something.

Sam: Yeah, Kieran can’t count. Or see properly.

Ted: And I’m not seeing much of an improvement in his foreign language skills, either! RSVP means… Repondre s’il vous plait. Which is French.

Sam: But, ironically, no one says it in France. We just use it on English invitations to ask for a reply.

Ted: That is a true fact, listeners!

Sam: Yes, listeners. And what have we learnt today, Ted?

Ted: Well, so our little experiment seems to show that one pint of beer might help you to relax, but any more alcohol than that has a rather negative effect on speaking foreign languages...

Sam: And not just the foreign ones!

Ted: We sure busted that myth, Sam.

Sam: Yup! We sure did, Ted -

Kieran: Merde. I feel sick.

Brooke: No no no! Not in the studio! Oh no, he didn’t…

Ted: He did.

Brooke: One of you can clean that up!

Sam: Well... that’s just great. Thanks for being such a… delightful… erm… guest, Keiran Savvy. I hope you get well soon and your French improves.

Ted: Once you’ve sobered up.

Sam: Yes… Well Ted, is that all for this week? Any other myths to bust?

Ted: Well, I was wondering something. Is the Queen of England really a lizard person from outer space?

Sam: Did you just ask me if Queen Elizabeth II is a lizard? Like, a reptile?

Ted: Yeah, well her skin is a bit wrinkly. You know there’s this myth that the royal family are actually shape-shifting lizard people from outer space …

Sam: Really? Well I never heard that one, but in the next episode we will actually be talking about Queen Elizabeth.

Ted: Really?

Sam: Yeah! It’s Christmas soon, and as you might know, every Christmas her Royal Majesty makes a speech. So I thought…

Ted: No, you didn’t.

Sam: Yes, I did. I thought you should learn to talk like an English queen!

T: Oh how divine!

Sam: Yes, well clearly you need a bit more practice… And so, listeners, tune in to us next time, when you’ll hear Ted making a mess, I mean making a great success of the posh British accent.

Ted: Yes, and don’t forget you can email us on podcasting@babbel.com or tweet at us @Babbel…
 
We’d love to hear your favorite acronyms, myths or weird language learning tips!

Sam: And if you subscribe to us wherever you get your podcasts you’ll get to hear tons more of myself, Sam.

Ted: And me Ted!

Kieran: Thanks for listening! 

What shall we do with the druken Kieran? What shall we do with the druken Kieran? What shall we do with the druken Kieran on a Babbel Podcast. 

Booze or Snooze Language Learning, Booze or Snooze Language Learning, Booze or Snooze Language Learning on a Babbel Podcast. Ohh Arrrhh!